You may have heard something about a big snowstorm on the East Coast? The news might have mentioned it once or twice.
We have thirty-five inches of snow and counting. A reminder: I live in Maryland, not in Antarctica. Above is our front yard. My car is under that big snow mountain to the left. Our house? Under that big snow mountain to the right. I am the one in the orange skiing to the store for essential survival provisions: (more) cookies and blue cheese stuffed olives, which we ran out of last night.
Besides the seven-hundred feet of snow trapping me (TRAPPING ME!) in the house (IN THE HOUSE!!), there is an animal stuck in our wall (IN OUR WALL!!!). My use of the caps lock and hyper-exclamation pointage is always a fair measure of my general mood and sanity level (SANITY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
Predictions are that we will be plowed out by Thursday. In five days. That is five too many days. If I wanted to live in the tundra, I would have moved to the tundra. The picture below nicely sums up my feelings on our winter wonderland situation and the "kittens" gnawing and scuttling in my wall and Mother Nature's mandated prohibition on going anywhere for days and days and days and DAYS .....
So. Back to my Cool Ranch Doritos and cookies. 4,000 calories a day of pure sugar and starch appears to have a calming effect on my mood. All five of my chins and I will be happy to say "Hasta la vista, baby!" to the resident penguins (and kittens) and "Hello, Bitch, Were You Been All This Time!? Have You Done Something Different With Your Hair Because You LOOK ABSOLUTELY FABULOUS!?" to Spring.
9 comments:
wow, love the top picture!
Oh how I hate snow! A friend of mine has been trying to get a squirrel out of her attic for months! Once they get in there, they never want to leave.
I left The Frozen Tundra this fall because I could not hack another year of cursing the fact that I didn't have a large enough yard for a team of sled dogs.
You have my deepest and most sincere sympathies. And, until whatever it is in your wall dies in there and proceeds to make a stink, it's perhaps better in the wall than scuttling across your cookies?
You probably wouldn't be impressed if I tell you that I live in MAINE and we have NO snow in our front yard....
hmmmmm Guess I won't mention that.
I have Blazin' Buffalo Doritos and 31 boxes of Girl Scout cookies. Wash them down with a fruit smoothie.
As part of the Piece of Cake Badge, my daughter took 3 Thin Mints and the leftover vanilla frosting from her birthday cupcakes and made a "layer cake." Gotta love Girl Scouts.
I'm so sorry you're stuck in that snow. My sister can't fly back in to BWI because of it, either. It's been a nasty Winter all around.
I am ready to kill.my.self. from being trapped. I am also about to kill B. he mentions the snow every 30 seconds. Literally. I GET IT IT HAS SNOWED.
Hey, how's this for fun?
MORE. FREAKING. SNOW. IS. COMING.
Really.
We got 30 inches here...ugh!! I think the plow truck broke down at least 3 times while working on the roads/parking lot...what a schmuck!!
~WM
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