Dr. God's Hands

I am waiting for the assistant to Dr. "God's Hands" (Ben Carson at Hopkins, per his self-titled book) to call me back. He was the first neurosurgeon that both the Hopkins and the UMD neurologists referred me too. I was told he does mainly pediatrics but will consult on a few adult cases per year.

When I called the Hopkins neurologist to report I was having problems getting in to see Dr. God's Hands, he replied "I will call and tell him that your diagnosis is an intraventricular brain tumor, that would excite him!"

Ummm - no. No exciting the world-class neurosurgeon. I want my brain to be as boring as can be. Boring. Textbook and boring. Not exciting.

Exciting means "dead" and then later written up in a medical journal about why my "case" was so exciting that I am now dead. I want to avoid that.

Dead people do not get to shop for shoes.